Of Poetry and Epics
by Fallen Ark Angel
Summary: In which Laxus sees himself as being a lot like Odysseus. Except for the sleeping around on his wife thing. Because seriously, Odysseus, that's a really jerk thing to do. - One-shot.


It had been months.

Five of them, actually. And ten days. Mira could probably pinpoint the hours too if she tried really hard, but she just wasn't up for that at the moment.

They couldn't even wait for him to get back into town. Instead they met up at an in between one, her taking off from work for a few days while Laxus, who had trouble with train travel, stopped off in the town they'd decided upon and just waited.

Mira could hardly contain her giddiness as she left Magnolia that afternoon. The entire train ride, she was practically bouncing out of her seat. And, when she finally arrived in town, she immediately headed to the specified hotel, grinning brightly at the man behind the desk.

"Mr. Dreyar left me a key, I think?" she asked giggling when the man nodded with his own polite smile.

"Of course. Room 304."

With it, Mira skipped off to it. She wasn't really sure if Laxus would be there yet, but was anxious to find out. And, as she slipped the key into the lock, she was ecstatic to find it already unlocked.

He was in there!

"Dragon." Mira tossed open the door with a grin. "Are you- Oh, Laxus."

"Why are you covering your eyes?" he carped as Mirajane quickly stepped in and shut the door behind her. "You're supposed to see me like this! It was the plan!"

Mira lowered her hand slowly, dropping her duffel bag from the other, it thudding softly on the floor. "The plan was for you to strip naked and flail out on a bed?"

"This isn't flailing," Laxus complained as he continued to lay on his side, staring at her. "This is posing."

Giving him a slight look, she asked, "That bad, huh?"

"Shuddup. And c'mere." He wagged his eye brows. "I might have something for you."

"Might?"

"No, I definitely do." That time, he gave her a dark gaze. "So get over here and-"

"You didn't lock the door, you know. Even though you left me a key-"

"I wanted you to stumble upon me like this."

"Well, I got that, but with the door being unlocked, anyone could have walked in."

"They should be so lucky to see me."

"You could have scarred a child for life."

"Then they shouldn't be sneaking into other people's rooms. Little bandits." Annoyed with her lack of moving towards him, Laxus moved to get out of the bed then and stalk over to her himself. "Now come here. Didn't you miss me? I missed you."

With him close enough then, Mirajane immediately moved to wrap her arms around him, naked or not. And Laxus only laughed, just slight, because he wasn't much one for giddiness, before gathering her in his own, lifting her into the air while he was at it.

"Of course I missed you," Mira mumbled as he kept her in his arms, carrying her right over to the bed. "I know five months isn't very long-"

"And ten days."

"And we talked, like, every other day, at least, on the lacrima."

"Every three."

"Plus you wrote me all those cutesy little postcards-"

"They were full-fledged letters, woman. And you never wrote me back."

"I never knew where you'd be. We discussed it on the lacrima that I couldn't send you letters if-"

"I still would have liked one."

"Would you have?" she asked as he sat down on the edge of the bed, dropping her before him. "Dragon?"

Nodding, he said, "Very much. About as much as I'd like you to wiggle out of that dress about now."

Instead, purple tiles appeared before Mirajane was standing there in something far more revealing and definitely more inciting than just being nude. Laxus sat back as she moved to climb into his lap, mumbling something to her about how she knew how much he loved lace.

But she was still on a better subject, holding his jaw in her hands while staring down into his dark eyes.

"I couldn't send you the letters, dragon," she said as his hands found better uses than just lying around dozily. "But I thought of them. I could tell you what I would have said. If you want."

Laxus nodded his head about as enthusiastically as he would ever be about anything.

"Yes."

"I'm not as fancy as you, of course."

"Of course."

"So there's no poems-"

"I told you in the letters," he carped slightly, "never to mention I sent you those aloud. And did you burn them after you read them? Like I asked? If the wrong person got a hold of those-"

"I'm keeping them forever and ever."

"Oh jeez I try and be a romantic just once-"

"You're always romantic." Mira ran a hand through his too long hair (he had a habit of not cutting it out on jobs; she'd be sure he had it cut to her liking in the next few days). "You send me flowers and love to take me nice places and, ooh, I've never met a man that enjoys bubble baths-"

"I don't enjoy them." He huffed. "I enjoy you being in them with me."

"Then how you always want to go to the beach-"

"Sunsets aren't romantic." His hands stilled. "Everyone likes them. Whether you're a sadist or romantic or even asexual. Only complete sociopaths don't enjoy them. And even still, sometimes they do. So-"

"My little romantic." Mira let out a deep moan then, reminding Laxus that he hadn't seen the woman in months (five of them to be exact and ten days) and he was kind of naked while she was wearing next to nothing while grinding, just a bit, into his lap. Fuck, he could be a romantic. He could also be a sociopath at the moment, if that was what turned her on. "Do you want to hear my letters?"

"Yes," he breathed, hands moving once more to toy with the lace. "Please."

And when it was all said and done, Laxus couldn't remember a single thing she said, but damn if her voice was heavenly in his ear the entire time. He only laid there for a bit, afterward, trying to let his mind catch up with the rest of of him.

Giggling, Mirajane snuggled up to the slayer, attempting to smooth down her hair some as well. "I love you."

"Mmmm." Laxus blinked up at the ceiling before glancing down at her. "I love you too. I'm so glad to be back. Even if we're not really back yet, just being with you is like being back. Better, even."

Mira grinned up at him. "Romantic."

That brought his grin right back down. "I am not."

"Sure."

Laxus got up about ten minutes later to go take a soak in the tub, leaving Mirajane behind as the water warmed. She only snuggled up under the blankets and nuzzled her head into a pillow, partially feeling wonderful just by being back around her boyfriend, but also because she had the next three days off and, oh, that just never happened.

"Mira," Laxus called eventually. The door to the adjoining bathroom had been left opened and she could hear the sound of him sinking into the bath. "Water's perfect."

She only moaned out some unintelligible things and didn't get up for a good five minutes. Even when she did, it was just to go relax in the tub with him.

"Hotel bathtubs kind freak me out," he admitted to her. "It's like your butt is sitting where someone else's butt has sat."

"Mmmm. You like hot tubs though. And people do way worse things in those."

"Yeah, but I can rationalize that. The scalding hot water sanitizes all the...you know."

"I don't know." Mirajane settled back against his chest and shut her eyes. "I don't know anything. And I don't like to think about things like that. I really don't like to think about anything, really."

"Oh, yes, demon, I know."

"I think I'm just the optimistic type."

"You certainly are," he agreed with a nod. "That's why I need you, you know."

"Uh-huh," she agreed. "Since you're such a disagreeable little dragon."

"How can I be disagreeable _and_ romantic? Huh?"

"Oh, stop fighting it. You know it's true." Mirajane let out a soft sigh. "Besides, I find it super sexy."

That got Laxus to pause. Then he frowned. "Really?"

"Mmmhmm."

"Well," he remarked, sitting up just a bit, "I am the type to do some romantic things. I guess."

"Uh-huh."

"I wrote all those poems myself, you know."

"Hmmm."

"I mean," he went on, "some guys would, like, buy a poetry book and try to pass it off. The schmucks. Not me. Nope. I would sit up at night and think of words that rhymed and...sounded pretty and… Because I'm a romantic."

"Completely."

"And remember that time that I surprised you at your house? For your birthday? With that party? That was pretty thoughtful, if not romantic."

"If not."

"And-"

"Dragon, shhh." She grabbed one of his arms and pulled it around herself. "And just relax."

"Don't you relax too much," he chided as he glanced down at the woman. "You fall asleep and drown in the tub, I'll have a hard time getting over you."

"I think only drunks do that."

"You mean you're not intoxicated on my romance?"

"Now you're pushing it."

They stayed in the tub long after the water lost it's heat and their conversations became less interesting. Eventually Laxus started to complain about his back hurting and that, if she would so kindly join him, he thought that the bed was pretty much calling their names.

"If we have to," Mirajane yawned as she stood. Glancing over her shoulder at him, she only said, "You are getting rather...pruney"

Laxus, who was standing as well, glanced down at himself before giving her a look.

"Shut it, woman," he grumbled with a frown. "For I make you."

It was with some giggling that Mirajane toweled off, though a lot of that had to do with the fact that it was Laxus who took it upon himself to towel her off.

He claimed to be rather proficient at it.

"It's an art, really."

"Using a towel?"

Nodding, the man said, "Not everyone can do it with as great accuracy as I. See right there? That little droplet of water?" Laxus gently ran the towel down Mira's right arm. "Not everyone could have spotted that."

"I'd hate to know just how you got so good at this skill."

"Self taught."

"On whose body?"

He gave her a look. "Don't get too jealous. I mostly enjoy toweling myself off."

"Is that what you enjoy doing to yourself?"

"Mira."

"My hair's dripping, dragon."

"Let me." Just as quickly, he was moving to roughly rustle her silvery hair with the fluffy cloth, causing Mira to giggle some more and bat at him then. Then, smiling himself, he took a step back from her and finally wiped himself down a bit. To her, he said, "It's still so early."

"I know. But you have to be tired."

"Why do I have to be?"

"Because you're old."

"Oh, right, I'm old."

"You are."

Ruffling his own hair with the towel, he tossed it to the ground before rather roughly reaching out to snatch Mirajane's hips, gripping tightly enough to make her gasp, if only slightly.

"I," he said as he just as quickly was lifting her quite effortlessly off her feet and over to the counter, "am not old."

"You sure about th- Ooh!" Mira sat bolt right up as he dropped her on the cool tile counter top. "That's cold, dragon."

"Good." One of his hands remained on her hip, though its grip slackened, while the other went to rest on her cheek. Mira, still feeling rather frozen, squirmed a bit around before his gaze caught hers and gave her more than enough of a command to knock it off. "It'll give me a chance to warm you up."

Resting a palm back on the counter, Mirajane leaned back, just a bit, staring him in the eyes regardless.

"Another one of your skills, I take it?"

With a smirk, the slayer nodded.

"Yeah," he whispered as he leaned down to nip at her neck. "One of the many."

Mirajane knew too, after that, that her dragon was done for the day. Back to back (an hour or so in between hardly mattered) wasn't something Laxus did well. When he fell into the bed that time, it was with no intention of ever getting up again, it seemed.

"I should have gone out and got us something to eat before you came," Laxus remarked as she laid beside him. He was resting on his back, staring up at the ceiling, while she only curled up towards him, doing that thing where she stared so wholly at him that Laxus honestly thought he was captivating her, while Mira mostly let her mind drift and hardly paid him any mind at all. "But then the food would have gotten cold. And now I really don't want to go out, so that sucks too."

"Mmmm."

"You're not too hungry are you?"

"No."

"Good." Laxus shut his eyes then. "Because you know I'd get you something if you wanted something, but-"

"I'm just fine with being with you right now, dragon."

Letting out a breath, he only said, "Same," before falling silent for some time. Mira knew he was asleep ten minutes later when the arms that had been folding across his chest fell to the sides and his snoring kicked in.

Mirajane only patted his chest gently before rolling onto her other side and resting a bit herself. When she awoke, however, it was to the sound of someone loudly yelling at another person somewhere out in the hall. She was confused, at first, and only laid there, waiting. It was only once she recalled that she was at a hotel with Laxus that she slowly pushed in the bed, rubbing at her eyes.

She wasn't shocked in the least to find that Laxus was still snoozing quite comfortably. When he was a dog tired as she was certain he was, an earthquake couldn't wake him. So she only pressed a kiss to his cheek before slipping right out of the bed and heading into the bathroom to go get ready to go get out. She wouldn't make the man get up; she could go find something to do all on her own.

Mirajane was heading out of the bathroom too and straight to the door. It had just clicked open when she heard the sound of Laxus sitting straight up.

"Where," he asked simply, voice dripping with grogginess, "are you headed?"

"Mmmm," Mira hummed, glancing over her shoulder at him, "to get something to eat. Did you want me to bring you something back or-"

"Get your stupid little butt back here."

"Laxus," Mirajane complained though she did shut the door once more and head back over to the bed. "Just go back to sleep. Sheesh. I can go get my own food."

"Sheesh me? Sheesh you. Wallkin' out on me while I'm sleepin'. You naughty demon."

She sat down on the edge of the bed as Laxus only clambered out of it, going over to where his bag sat, riffling through it for something to put on.

"I just," Mirajane complained, "think that if you're still tired-"

"I don't get tired, woman."

"-that you should just let me go get us food alone."

"No."

"You're clingy."

"Am not."

"Dragon-"

"Mira-"

"You know that I like being around you too. Especially after five months."

"And ten days."

Nodding, she said, "But you don't have to go everywhere with me."

"Kinda do, woman, so get over it."

"You're always like this after long jobs," she chided with a frown.

And he was. Always. Mirajane used to think that it was so cute too, the way that he behaved after being gone for so long, but recently it had begun to rub her wrong. It wasn't that she still didn't find it cute the way that he wanted to spend as much time as possible with her, as if to make up for the lost, but rather she felt almost as if he were getting more than a tad possessive in those moments.

"Am not."

"You're like a woman."

"Watch it, demon." He glared over at her after pulling on a shirt. "I'm gonna go with you, so get over it. We can go out and eat a real meal. You should be happy."

"Should I be?"

Nodding, he said, "I'm the ideal man, Mira. Getting up out of bed to treat you to dinner? That's going above and beyond."

"Dessert is going above and beyond."

"We're trying to save up jewels, remember?"

"Ice cream won't ruin that."

He only rolled his eyes before saying, "Yeah, sure. We can get ice cream or something after."

"Alright!" Mirajane popped right up then, grinning brightly once more, all thoughts about how bothersome his dependency was gone. "Well, hurry up then so we can get going, okay?"

Though months had passed since the two had last seen one another, they had been in contact frequently, so there wasn't much to catch one another up on. Mira, however, seemed really interested in Laxus detailing his job to her in full finally and, well, he was all for that. Because for as much love as Laxus had with bragging on himself, his demon enjoyed hearing such boasting just as much.

They also got in some conversation on some minor things that she hadn't told him as of yet, including some argument she'd had with Lisanna, that she and Cana had gone out one weekend when she was off with Lucy and had fun, as well as how she and Makarov were considering redecorating his home.

"Why?" Laxus grumbled, unable to hold his tongue at that one. "He's, like, a thousand. So-"

"Dragon-"

"And he's going to expect us to loan him some jewels-"

"He will not."

"Bet."

"Dragon-"

"No."

Huffing, she said, "Fine." Then, lifting up her glass to take a drink, she said quickly, "We can talk about it later."

"What? N-"

"So what was that part about your job you told me?" She even batted her eyes. "Something about you beating someone's skull in?"

"Bashing, but sure."

"Tell me about that again. Please?"

Nrrg. The woman knew his weaknesses.

By the time they made it back to the hotel, both had more than gotten accustomed to being around one another again and had fallen into a relatively comfortable silence. Mira kept glancing up at Laxus, but he had nothing to say to her, really, and just waited for her to explain herself, but she wasn't going to, it seemed.

"Did you want something else?" Laxus asked as Mirajane headed immediately into the bathroom, shutting the door behind her. "'cause I think I'mma go have a smoke out on the balcony and I know you hate the smell-"

"It makes me think of work," came her muffled reply. Then, "And you can, Lax. I think I'll get Lisanna or Kinana on the lacrima and see how-"

"No."

"What?"

"My smoking makes you think of work, but talking to them about work-"

"It's different."

Rolling his eyes, he only went over to his sack before retrieving his cigar box. Then, with a frown towards the bathroom door, he said simply, "Yeah, whatever."

Outside, Laxus watched the sleepy town with disinterest as he puffed away at his cigar. He felt better, of course, just from being around Mirajane, but he really wanted to get back to Magnolia already. Sleep in his own bed. See the Thunder Legion. And yeah, fine, check in on Gramps too.

He was thinking about the stupid old coot (who he knew he'd be buying new furniture, why even fight it) when the door leading out to the balcony slid opened and Mirajane came waltzing out there with him.

"What are you doin'?" He held his cigar away from her. "Did you forget your lacrima? Mine's in my-"

"No," she sighed, coming to lean against the railing with him. "If you don't want me to deal with the guild until we go home-"

"I didn't say that." He got a look for that causing him to frown before saying, "Well, yeah, I said it, but I-"

"It's fine." Mirajane grinned up at him. "And your smoke isn't, like, completely horrible to smell. I mean, sure, it's slowly killing both of us, but-"

"Mirajane-"

Through giggles, she said, "And I know how you want to do everything together-"

"Well, not everything," he grumbled. "Whatever you were doing in that bathroom-"

"I was taking off my makeup!"

"Sure."

"Dragon-"

He blew his smoke away from her before going back to watching over the railing. "I just miss you. And I know that five months isn't that long and that I have to take these jobs, because we're saving for a house, but-"

"And a wedding and life, in general. Not to mention your grandfather's-"

"I am not buying that man-"

"-medical expenses."

Laxus blinked. Then he frowned, down at the woman. "What?"

"Well, you know, he's old. And if he needs us to pay for any-"

"What kind of medical-"

"I was just saying, Laxus. I don't know. He's not, like, sick right now or anything. So don't worry about it."

"Worry?" Snort. Then puff. "I'm not worried. I don't get worried. About anything. So-"

"Alright," Mira caved, rolling her eyes a bit. "Whatever you say."

Still, when he finished his cigar, Laxus forced Mirajane to go inside and contact someone from the hall.

"You know, because you want to," he insisted. "And you wanna check in on Gramps, don't you?"

"W-Well, Master told me just to have a good time and not to worry about-"

"Yes, I know, but you will anyways, won't you? So just-"

"I guess that's right."

"Of course it is." Laxus went to fetch one of their lacrimas for her. "Get him. Right now. To alleviate your mind."

Now, Mira was plenty naive about many things, but she knew what was going on. Laxus wasn't being near deceptive enough. So when Makarov's face appeared on the lacrima (leering at first, as it was Laxus' lacrima that had contacted him, though the sight of Mirajane immediately made him grin), the first thing she did was question him about his health and how he was feeling.

"I do not understand," he said after assuring her of his good health, "why you are so concerned, Mirajane. I have not taken a turn for the worst in the past few hours since we last saw one another."

"Yes, well," she said, staring down at the lacrima as Laxus loomed in the background, "I just wanted to be sure, Master. And you know how much Laxus and I love you."

Laxus snorted loud enough for Makarov to catch it while the old man only grumbled something about having to get back to work and that he would see her when she returned.

Then it was just the slayer and the demon once more.

"What do you wanna do for the rest of the evening?" Laxus asked as they both found themselves snuggling up in bed after that. "Mirajane?"

'This is nice," she remarked as she slipped one of her hands beneath his shirt , stroking the muscles there. "Don't you think?"

Nodding with a bit of a grin, Laxus just as quickly said, "You know that I'm going to have to go out on another one of these S-Class jobs soon."

"I know."

"I mean, I hope not for another five months-"

"So do I." Mirajane gave him her best sad eyes she knew, the deep blues appearing watery. "It was almost half a year that you were away."

"Yeah, I know." His grin fell. "I hated it too."

"And it's not that I don't trust you, of course, but five months..."

"I get it. I trust you too, but it's still a pretty long time."

"I mean," she was sure to say, "I'd go the rest of my life waiting for you, if I had to."

"Same."

"If you got lost out on a job or something...and I didn't know what happened to you… Until I was certain that you were… I would still search for you."

"And I would spend the rest of my life trying to get back to you," Laxus agreed. "Like the Odyssey. I-"

"Laxus, that guy in the Odyssey slept with other women while he was trying to get back home."

Frowning, the man sat up. "What?"

"Yeah." Mira nodded. "A lot, I think."

"No way."

"Yes way."

"B-But he had a wife and a kid waiting for him back-"

"Well, he did, so-"

"No way! Gramps used to tell me that story all the time when I was a kid and-"

"I think he slept with that woman on that island. Calypso."

Laxus fell back into the bed. "Gramps said that he just became real good friends with her."

"Yeah." Mirajane went back to stroking his chest. "Real good."

"Well that's shit."

"If makes you feel better, I think he was being held captive."

"Would it make you feel better if I had sex with someone holding me captive?"

"No."

"Then there's your answer."

"Mmmm." Mirajane smiled up at him. "You never told me that Master used to tell you those sorts of stories when you were a kid."

"Of course he did." Laxus made a face up at the ceiling. "Odysseus was, like, the coolest hero ever to me when I was a little kid. And there were so many different stories Gramps would tell me about him. I wanted to go on a journey just like him, when I got older."

"That's so cute." Mirajane giggled. "And it makes so much sense. Why you like to travel around so much."

"Yeah, but I wouldn't be a douche," he grumbled. "Sleepin' around on my woman. What kinda dragon do you take me for?"

"A very faithful one, apparently."

Nodding, he said, "Even Ivan, as shitty as he was, didn't cheat on my mother."

"Well," Mira sang, shutting her eyes, "that might have had to do with the fact that no woman would ever want Ivan, but-"

"Demon."

With a smile she said, "I love learning little things about you."

"What about you then?" he grumbled.

"Hmmm?"

"Why do you know so much about some stupid old story?" he asked. "Did your dad tell you about those sorts of things too?"

"Oh, no. My parents weren't… You know that I came from that tiny village. We'd have never heard of anything like that."

"Then-"

"I have to do _something_ with my free time," Mirajane pointed out, hand stilling against his chest. "And you people are always wanting to talk about old gods and heroes. Rajin, Titania- So I occasionally peruse such things."

"The Odyssey is more than just a peruse," Laxus pointed out.

"Well, I've hit the high notes, of course, not read the entire epic."

"And the high note for you was him sleeping with other women besides his wife?"

"The high note, dragon, was ruining your dream. I just didn't realize I would have a chance to do it when I learned about it."

"Fate then, I take it," he remarked to which she nodded.

"Everything about us is, isn't it, dragon?"

"Mmmm." Turning his head down, he buried his nose in her hair, taking a deep whiff. There was no scent that kept Laxus calmer than hers.

None.

He had no way of knowing, of course, that Mira still went to bed most nights during his long jobs in one of his shirts, just to feel the same comfort.

But...he'd have guessed it if questioned.

"I love you," he mumbled to her as Mira's hand, still beneath his shirt, expertly began to trace the tattoo adorning his chest.

"Yeah," she sighed, breathing softly, thinking all the while of just what they could do for their next few free days. Cut his hair was definitely up there. "I love you too."

* * *

 **Bleh. I've been in a pretty big slump recently, I feel, with my writing and I'm still trying to get the next chapter of Accidents and Incidents out (it's been over two months now, I think, and that's just not acceptable for me), but I don't want to not update during that time, so I guess you guys will just get pretty bland shit like this for now. Cutesy, I guess, is the word.**


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